Sorry, But Not Sorry...
It's Mother's Day, and I wish all of you amazing mom's out there a fabulous day!!! So why am I apologizing? Let me explain.
You see, there are SO many ideas that blow through my head on any given day that I would love to accomplish with my website, my book, and my training clients. It's almost endless. I would love to have more time to make these things actually happen... but you see, I am a mom. And THAT job, above all else, comes first. Us moms have many roles, and I know all of you out there can understand this and agree. Many of us are wives, nurses, doctors, dentists, bankers, secretaries, business women, chefs, engineers, sales women, trainers... and the list goes on. I am a wife, a mom, a nurse and a trainer. It's tough to juggle all things and feel like you are doing them all well. We all get that. I fail and make mistakes quite often at all of them! But I am also passionate about each role as well, which is why I don't quit... at any of them.
But the main reason that I am not always able to follow through with all my "great ideas" for my website or training is because my job as a mom comes first. I have learned the hard way that kids need and want my attention, and they notice when they are not getting enough. Sometimes this is beyond my control, but other times, oh yes... I can certainly make some changes and sacrifices if I am willing to open my eyes to the need. Could I be working on all kinds of blog posts, updates to my book (or even writing a second one), paying more "extra attention" to some of my clients or any other task... once my kids are home from school? Sure, I COULD, but I won't. That' s mom time. My kids are only here with me for a short time. They come first, and everything else can wait. I am blessed to have a website to share things, a book to let my ideas be known, and awesome training clients I have the ability to influence and help. I am grateful for all of that, but my kids come first, so any other items above and beyond what I currently am able to accomplish, can be put on hold. That can always happen later, but having my kids at this moment, at these exact ages, will be gone in a flash. So I will not beat myself up for not doing as much as I would like.
Examples of things people have said to me over the years: "Why don't you market your book more?", "Why don't you do an updated revised edition?", "Why don't you do more emailing to promote your site?", "Why don't you go around to all the hospitals to promote your book?", "Why don't you follow up more with past clients?", "Why don't you write blog posts at least once per week?", "Why don't you run more free challenges?".... While these are all great ideas, my response is simply "Sorry, but not sorry". I am a mom, and I don't have the extra time to do all that right now. That doesn't mean ever, but right now, they are my priority. And they take up a LOT of time! :-) I used to think I would have so much time when my kids were a bit more self sufficient, past the toddler years. NOPE! Who out there has teens? Pre-teens? Talk about emotionally needy!!! And that is SO important for me to feel that I am emotionally and physically present for them right now, at least as much as possible. That's number one.
So for anyone out there who wishes I was doing more with my book, or website, or training... I am sorry, but not sorry. And feel free to be "sorry, but not sorry" for whatever is tugging at you in your life when you know you need to be there for your kids first. You will not regret letting that wait, or being super patient with it over time. Your kids are only with you for a short time. Let them enjoy you, as you enjoy them. Happy Mother's Day to you all!!!
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Terri Wentzell is a registered nurse with more than 20 years of experience. She is also a certified personal trainer, wellness coach, fitness nutrition coach, and sport yoga instructor.